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You ought to know Mr. Mistoffelees!You ought to know Mr. Mistoffelees
You ought to know Mr. Mistoffelees! The Original Conjuring Cat— (There can be no doubt about that). Please listen to me and don't scoff. All his Inventions are off his own bat. There's no such Cat in the metropolis; He holds all the patent monopolies For performing suprising illusions And creating eccentric confusions. At prestidigitation And at legerdemain He'll defy examination And deceive you again. The greatest magicians have something to learn From Mr. Mistoffelees' Conjuring Turn. Presto! Away we go! And we all say: OH! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
He is quiet and small, he is black From his ears to the tip of his tail; He can creep through the tiniest crack, He can walk on the narrowest rail. He can pick any card from a pack, He is equally cunning with dice; He is always deceiving you into believing That he's only hunting for mice. He can play any trick with a cork Or a spoon and a bit of fish-paste; If you look for a knife or a fork And you think it is merely misplaced— You have seen it one moment, and then it is gawn! But you'll find it next week lying out on the lawn.
And we all say: OH! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
His manner is vague and aloof, You would think there was nobody shyer— But his voice has been heard on the roof When he was curled up by the fire. And he's sometimes been heard by the fire When he was about on the roof— (At least we all heard that somebody purred) Which is incontestable proof Of his singular magical powers: And I have known the family to call Him in from the garden for hours, While he was asleep in the hall. And not long ago this phenomenal Cat Produced seven kittens right out of a hat! And we all said: OH! Well I never! Did you ever Know a Cat so clever As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
You should be familiar with Mr. Mistoffelees! He is the first Conjuring Cat— (There is no doubt about that). Please pay attention and don't mock. All his Creations are entirely his own. There is no such Cat in the city; He has all the exclusive rights For performing surprising tricks And creating strange confusions. In sleight of hand And in trickery He will resist scrutiny And fool you once more. The best magicians have lessons to learn From Mr. Mistoffelees' magic act. Abracadabra! Here we go! And we all exclaim: OH! Well, I never! Has there ever been A Cat so smart As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
He is quiet and small, he is black From his ears to the end of his tail; He can sneak through the smallest opening, He can walk on the thinnest rail. He can select any card from a deck, He is equally clever with dice; He is always tricking you into thinking That he is just looking for mice. He can perform any trick with a cork Or a spoon and some fish paste; If you search for a knife or a fork And believe it is just misplaced— You saw it one moment, and then it is gone! But you'll find it next week lying on the lawn.
And we all exclaim: OH! Well, I never! Has there ever been A Cat so smart As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
His demeanor is unclear and distant, You would think there was nobody more shy— But his voice has been heard on the roof When he was curled up by the fire. And he has sometimes been heard by the fire When he was up on the roof— (At least we all heard that someone purred) Which is undeniable proof Of his unique magical abilities: And I have known the family to call Him in from the garden for hours, While he was napping in the hall. And not long ago, this amazing Cat Produced seven kittens right out of a hat! And we all said: OH! Well, I never! Did you ever Know a Cat so smart As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!