The Ghastly Sun

Stephen L. HarrisonEnglish23 lines1 public analyses
Original Poetry
Translation
The Ghastly Sun
The Terrifying Sun
Stephen L. Harrison
Stephen L. Harrison
The sun streams through my early-morning brain,
The sun enters my mind early in the morning,
blinding my eyes like the scorched deserts of the world.
blinding my eyes like the hot deserts of the world.
Sun God, leave me alone
Sun God, leave me alone
in my grey room,
in my dull room,
with poverty and torn sheets
with poverty and ripped sheets
and the stains previous denied,
and the stains I once ignored,
still on them
still there—
the only memory I have of her,
the only memory I have of her,
the only real memory.
the only true memory.
The birds are singing, and I hate them too:
The birds are singing, and I dislike them too:
noise that disturbs my ruminations,
sounds that interrupt my thoughts,
drives me to the brink
push me to the edge
of what a man betrayed should tolerate.
of what a betrayed man should endure.
I prayed last night,
I prayed last night,
really prayed
truly prayed—
pleaded, begged,
asked, begged,
betrayed myself,
went against myself,
sold my id, my ego,
gave up my identity, my self-respect,
turned to dust.
became nothing.
Leave me now, world.
Leave me now, world.
Just fucking leave me alone.
Just leave me alone.
 

Explanation

Stephen L. Harrison's poem 'The Ghastly Sun' captures the intense struggle of a person dealing with inner turmoil and isolation. The poem begins with the sun's intrusive presence, symbolizing an unwelcome force that blinds and overwhelms the speaker, much like the harshness of a desert. This imagery sets the stage for the speaker's plea for solitude, as he seeks refuge in his 'grey room' filled with reminders of poverty and a lost relationship.

The speaker's disdain extends to the singing birds, whose cheerful noise contrasts sharply with his somber mood, highlighting his deep-seated resentment and emotional exhaustion. This tension builds as he reflects on his own betrayal, having 'sold my id, my ego,' suggesting a profound sense of loss and self-abandonment. The repetition of 'prayed' emphasizes the desperation and futility of his pleas for relief.

The emotional arc of the poem moves from a sense of invasion and irritation to a profound plea for isolation and peace. The tone is one of despair and frustration, underscored by the raw language and direct address to the 'Sun God' and the world.

Harrison employs vivid imagery and stark contrasts to convey the speaker's internal conflict. The use of metaphor, such as the sun representing an oppressive force, and the personification of the sun as a 'Sun God,' adds depth to the speaker's struggle. The poem's free verse form allows for a natural, unrestrained expression of emotion.

Ultimately, 'The Ghastly Sun' speaks to the universal experience of feeling overwhelmed by external and internal pressures, seeking solace in solitude, and grappling with the remnants of past relationships. It reflects the poet's exploration of memory and identity, resonating with readers who have faced similar emotional battles.

Word Dictionary15

WordIn EnglishPlain (English)Pron.
ghastlyterrifying, horriblevery scary or very badghast-lee
streamsflows, poursflows steadilystreems
scorchedburned, charredburned by heatskorcht
ruminationsthoughts, reflectionsdeep thoughtsroo-mi-nay-shuns
betrayeddeceived, let downlet down by someone trustedbe-trayd
pleadedbegged, imploredasked stronglyplee-did
egoself-esteem, self-imagesense of selfee-go
idinstincts, primal desiresbasic instinctsid
tolerateendure, bearput up withtol-er-ayt
povertylack of money, needinessbeing very poorpov-er-tee
stainsmarks, spotsmarks that are hard to cleanstayns
prayedasked, beseechedtalked to a godpray-d
dustpowder, dirttiny bits of dirtdust
leavego away, departgo awayleev
aloneby oneself, solitaryby oneselfuh-lohn

Poet & Context

EraContemporary

Stephen L. Harrison is a contemporary poet and writer from Edmonton, London. His work explores themes of memory, desire, grief, and identity, often reflecting on the reconstruction of the self after buried truths come to light.


WhenContemporary period
WhyThe poem reflects personal themes of isolation, grief, and the struggle with inner demons, likely inspired by personal experiences or broader human conditions.
FormFree verse

Themes & More

IsolationDespairMemoryInner Conflict
Metaphor: The sun as an oppressive force.Personification: The sun as 'Sun God'.Imagery: Vivid descriptions of the sun and room.Repetition: Emphasizing the plea in 'prayed'.
The Ghastly Sun by Stephen L. Harrison — Poem, Translation & Meaning